


out of the shadows

by windfalling



Category: The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-14
Updated: 2014-04-14
Packaged: 2018-01-19 08:14:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1462201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/windfalling/pseuds/windfalling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She becomes<i> Sankta Alina</i>, the light to push back the darkness, merciful and cruel. Post-<i>Siege and Storm</i>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	out of the shadows

**Author's Note:**

> forgive me for any canon inaccuracies -- it's been a while since i've read the books. but if anything jumps out at you, let me know!
> 
> EDIT 25/07/2014:  
> ( **SPOILERS**!! for ruin  & rising)  
> i can't? believe the shadow thing actually happened? omg i am so happy about it but also uh i guess regard this as a missing scene of sorts or something, slightly au but not... exactly i guess

 

 

 

 

She starts the day greeted by the prayers of her people.

The pilgrims and the sun soldiers regard her with reverence wherever she goes, their hungry faith swallowing her whole. She becomes _Sankta Alina_ , the light to push back the darkness, merciful and cruel.

But with light comes darkness, and he haunts her still. 

 

 

 

Alina dreams of the same horrors every night.

Sometimes it’s the screams of the people she left to die on the skiff; other times it’s the mangled bodies in the palace, Fedyor and Marie, cut to pieces. Some nights, she sees the familiar faces of pilgrims and sun soldiers devoured by his _nichevo’ya_ , and she thinks they might be premonitions of what is to come. The worst is when she wakes and feels his presence through the collar, his rage echoing through their connection and rattling her composure. 

The one small comfort she has is that his shadow no longer comes to visit. Alina hopes that it’s because he’s weakened, or maybe it’s because she’s become stronger; either way, she is relieved. 

 

 

 

Tolya and Tamar do not burst into her room anymore when she wakes screaming in the middle of the night. Instead, it is Mal who slips into her room, Mal who wraps his arms around her trembling shoulders, Mal who whispers, _it’s okay, come back, come back to me, Alina_.

She does not love him as much as he loves her, but she does love him, and for his sake, she tries.

 

 

 

Once—and she does not tell anyone of this, not Mal, not Tolya, or Tamar—she reaches out to him, just as he had done to her.

She isn’t sure how she does it, exactly, but there is darkness in her now, his power to harness as her own. When she closes her eyes and focuses, she can find him. So Alina shapes herself into shadow, and when she opens her eyes, she is there.

The Darkling does not notice her at first. She has these few moments to herself, just observing—watching the man who brought the kingdom to ruins, who devoured cities whole. He is there, sitting on his broken throne, dark wisps circling his fingers. He is all sunken cheeks and brittle bones; he had not gone unscathed from what she’d done, either. 

When he does notice, he only turns his head slightly to address her where she is, a few steps behind the throne. 

“You could have been the most powerful _grisha_ this world has seen,” he says, fingers tightening on the armrests. 

“Could have?” Alina stands beside him. She meets his cold gaze with her own. “I will be,” she says, voice low. “Watch me.”

The Darkling’s hand shoots out to wrap around her wrist, vice-tight, and the lack of pain is secondary to the momentary shock of his touch. The realization that he cannot hurt her in this form makes her bold: she rests a steady hand on the side of his face, gliding it down to his jaw. He watches her, guarded but curious, making no move to stop her.

Alina bends her head to his ear and slides her hand down to lightly wrap around his throat, stopping at the place where her own collar lay. “I’m coming for you,” she promises.

Then she is gone.

 

 

 

It takes a long time for the light to come back to her.


End file.
